joy in making my own decisions and not seeking approval

Today has been a mixture of heavy and light. There was a lightness and freedom because of an important decision I had been led to make. There was also a heaviness of concern about how that decision would impact others. I had to look at why that heaviness was there. The root of it was that I was worried about the disapproval and misunderstanding of those others. I had to work through those feelings to a place of acceptance of my right to make this decision and my need to accept myself and not to worry if those others would accept me for my decision or understand it or approve of it. So I came to a new place of freedom. Making a big decision and accepting the consequences and not seeking approval were scarey moves- they led me out into a new place of risk and by facing my fears led me further along on my path to freedom. That brings joy today.